4chan:

HOW TO MEET THE GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS (FOOLPROOF)

Buy a falconer’s glove.

Approach the girl that you like wearing the falconers glove.

Ask her, “Excuse me, have you seen a falcon fly by here?”

Look up to the sky, hopeful/sad.

If she says “No,” look distraught and ask her if she wouldn’t mind helping you look for your falcon.

No human being would ever turn down an opportunity like this.

Use the time you spend together searching for the falcon to get to know her.

At the end of your search (10 minutes) you will probably need consoling re: the loss of your one true friend.

By this point her interest in you based on the fact that you were able to put so much love and time into the raising of a falcon will more than ensure a second date, and from there it’s just a hop skip and a jump to marriage.

Good luck!

*NOTE: If by chance a falcon does appear out of nowhere, simply say “(falcon’s name) I’ve missed you so much! Don’t ever scare me like that again!” Then offer to take the girl to dinner for helping you find your lost falcon. Bonus: You just got a free falcon!

74
  1. alexszatmary reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    (via maxistentialist)
  2. everythingisfantastic reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    Man I would fall for this any day.
  3. slaggetyslagg reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    Sometimes good things come from 4chan:
  4. tattysybarite reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    Genius! Do they sell these on amazon?
  5. vennetian reblogged this from sonicbloom11
  6. i-wouldnt-mind reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    fantastic idea!!!
  7. wordshappen reblogged this from maxistentialist
  8. tideofthought reblogged this from maxistentialist
  9. phatphish reblogged this from maxistentialist
  10. gir4ff3z reblogged this from maxistentialist
  11. lowlidswideeyes reblogged this from maxistentialist
  12. spacesnail reblogged this from maxistentialist
  13. the-collector reblogged this from sonicbloom11
  14. sonicbloom11 reblogged this from maxistentialist
  15. funktastik reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    If said girl is looking for her missing teacup poodle, some ugly conclusions may be drawn.
  16. hanjorb reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    This is how I met my first husband.
  17. kittycatmeowmeow reblogged this from pizzadelivery
  18. saucymagpies reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    Or: Actually go to the trouble of actually learning falconry. Then do all that. Awesomeness factor would increase...
  19. radical--notions reblogged this from optimalpursuits
  20. dawnofthefox reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    I’d totally go for a date with a guy in this situation. It’s clever.
  21. optimalpursuits reblogged this from pizzadelivery
  22. tzillah reblogged this from maxistentialist and added:
    I think the type man who trains falcons for a living might frighten me. But one of my favorite poems is about a falcon...
  23. pizzadelivery reblogged this from sin-dictive
  24. iiceiicebby reblogged this from yagirlheidi
  25. yagirlheidi reblogged this from maxistentialist